Every man knows that words can flip a switch. You’re in it one minute and then you wonder why you even made the effort to show up. When it comes to looks or chemistry, sometimes it is the wrong word at the wrong time that stops things dead in their tracks. When you have bills to pay, a business to run, a job to keep, the last thing you need is someone sucking the juice out of you. Here are the things that kill attraction quickly and why they’ll never be able to forget them.
Baby Talk
If a female uses baby talk or nicknames that are too cute, interest fades. It is like you are a kid rather than a man that she is attracted to. Men desire love, not to be treated like a baby. It’s okay for some to be playful, but once it gets into the babyish range, it becomes uncomfortable.
Using the term “Dude” or “Bro”
Being addressed as ‘dude’ by your wife or girlfriend? It’s not cute, it’s friend zone talk. Intimacy, not frat house vibes, is what is key to attraction. If she says the same things she would towards her co-worker, the flair is taken away. A man doesn’t need to be cooed all the time, but definitely doesn’t want to be lumped in with the guys from the bar.
Mocking Your Passions
It’s worse to see her laughing at something you are serious about. When people are making fun of your career, your side career, even something you really like, it hits you like a ton of bricks and you feel like you have no matter. In the absence of respect, attraction dies. When she makes what drives you a joke, she makes you feel further and further away from the connection and you become resentful.
Playing Dumb on Purpose
The coy smile that precedes the words, “I don’t know,” isn’t cute. Feigning ignorance is a nuisance and a blow to a person’s’s pride. Men like honesty and intelligence but not games which make her look helpless. When a guy values growth and competence, he’s an instant attraction killer if he is acting stupid on purpose.
“Just Want To Be a Housewife”
There’s nothing wrong with building a family, but stating this with no ambition beyond it can be a deal breaker. Drive, passion and purpose are qualities that many men enjoy. Hearing that she doesn’t want anything more than to coast can make him check out. Men do not want to feel like walking a dead weight.
Refusing to Apologize
Don’t say sorry – it’s not confidence it’s arrogance. Men read it on the woman’s face when she doesn’t take responsibility and it takes the respect out of the room. Both parties have to take responsibility for their relationships. If he keeps hearing excuses and not apologies, he will soon lose interest in the girl, since pride is not a sexy trait.
Assume That He Will Always Pay
“Oh, I thought you were paying me.” The seven words strike romance down like a sledgehammer. Most men are willing to treat, but when it comes to giving the person feels like it’s a duty. Balance and appreciation are more important than the perfect split. Men don’t like to be treated as a walking ATM.
“How Are You Still Single?”
This is the same as the word ‘curiosity,’ but it comes across as an insult. It indicates that something is amiss with you. Men do not like to be judged and criticized for being not attached. If she is not interested, asking the question is futile. If she is, then she may just say so without him feeling like a defect.
“Act Like a Man”
Hearing this is like getting slapped with a cliché. It’s not advice, it’s a demotion. Men are not taught how to be men by anyone, particularly by a man who says the word as if it’s a sword in a fight. But respect begets attraction, and this streak drips with respect.
Friend-Zone Language
“Hey friend.” This is a sure way to die chemistry. Or, as being “just friends” with other men, while you feel they are the backup plan. Exclusivity and connection is what romance is all about, not the faintest of intimations that he’s just another pal in her circle. A man doesn’t want to be her pal, he wants to be her partner.
Bringing Up Past Mistakes
“What was it you did when you had the chance to screw up?” Men go “off-line” when they hear this in the middle of a new disagreement. No one wants to feel as though they are having a year of mistakes that are being stored up for future ammunition. When discussions resemble a cross-examination in court, the attraction goes out the window. Men want to move on, not back down.
Comparing Him to An Ex
“You’re just like my old boyfriend/girlfriend.” Tell them, and the attraction will be over. No one wants to play against die-hard, old-timers. If a woman drags her ex into the running conversation, it is a sign of unfinished business. Men don’t spend a lot of time around when they feel as if they are dating her memories rather than her.
“You Deserve Someone Better”
It’s a line that will cut like a knife when it’s supposed to be noble. It says to him, “not enough.” As much as she may be trying to make light of his worth, it is ultimately a rejection of it. When men hear this, they do not feel respected, they feel dismissed. However, attraction cannot withstand rejection.
“We Need to Talk”
There’s nothing that can make a man’s tummy turn over quicker. It simply doesn’t sound like good news every time they hear it. It seems like a lecture, not a discussion. Men do not like to be shot into an “ambush” disguised as communication. She would be better off with honesty than with a warning shot if she wants to gain a genuine connection.
Throwing Around Ultimatums
If you cannot love me when I am at my worst, then you haven’t got a heart. Men think that is a cliché when they hear it. It’s not “cute,” it’s “manipulative. Attraction dies when he feels like he’s signing up for endless drama instead of a partnership. It’s better to show respect than to give ultimatums.
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